I have a friend who tells me I think too much and I gave him the name Whiskers because if you put some hairs at the opposite ends of his nose, he would look like a cat. This is one of the many examples of my thinking. I have always wanted to help people get through certain challenges in their lives, but I was never keen on addressing the issues in my life. Some of which really made me lose track of where I was going and what I was aiming for. Fortunately, I have always had good friends who make me sort myself out before entangling myself in another web of undeniable confusion. It is from the point of friendship that my dream begins.
We all have those friends we go to when we feel like the walls of our lives are collapsing. When we need to cry, when we need to jump up and down and look like two year olds or when we need a break from the workplace and want to enjoy an evening of drinks. If you asked your buddy about that friend, they would never explain who they are, but how they are. By this I mean their characteristics and how they add value to their lives. Much as we all have such friends, we all still have skeletons we hide in our closets. Whether it is the abusive husband you are still married to, the abortion you had right after school or the stress you are going through because your parents are divorcing. What makes the difference is why we have these skeletons.
Some people are afraid of what society will say. We are all brought up in different backgrounds and how we are taught to live with our mistakes is another issue altogether. One parent will make their child understand that no matter what happens, they can always seek advice and they will be helped. Now another parent will make it clear to their child that certain behaviours shall not be condoned. Yet both make mistakes, but only one feels like they have a support system at home.
There is another group of people who seek comfort in, "with what I have been through, this is nothing." Just by that, one can see that this person has already accepted calamity as part of their lifestyle. Not that any life is all roses and daisies, but that doesn't mean we stay in situations because we have been through worse. Another common reason is that nobody will understand.
I learnt the other day that unless you are empathetic by nature or experience, you will be judgmental by default. A good example would be a family that just lost the father. This mother has known only one man in her life, the teenage son looked up to his father and the 10 year old daughter is not sure what is going on. The mother spirals into depression, the boy starts a life of drugs and the daughter grows up giving sexual favours to men. They all feel lost but cannot speak up about it. They are all looking for something but you will not understand in their opinion.
My dream is to start a foundation, but before then I have a few things I need to learn. When life gives you lemons, does it expect you to make lemonade? Maybe so, but unless you are willing, then we cannot help you. Remember dear friend, "WE ARE HERE FOR YOU." Similarly, unless you chose the wrong type of friends, you will be surprised at the lengths to which your friends will be a support system for you. So today, with an eye opening piece of advice from my aunt, I have discovered what I want to write about. I just hope that as we walk through this journey togehter, we will learn more than we ever anticipated.